Both translations are in verse, but they handle line length and register very differently. Verity writes in lines that vary freely in length and read close to natural English speech. His diction is contemporary without being casual: "this crazed god, this shape formed of evil, this two-faced scoundrel" (Book 5) has directness and a little edge. Merrill writes in quantitative hexameters, a formal English equivalent of Homer's meter, which produces longer lines with a pronounced rhythm: "ruinous rage which brought the Achaians uncounted afflictions." That pattern gives his verse a ceremonial feel. In Book 6, Verity renders the leaves simile in four plain lines; Merrill's version takes the same content and stretches it across longer, more ornate lines. Neither is archaic in vocabulary, but Merrill's syntax is more inverted and his word order more deliberately classical. Verity's priority is readability. His lines carry the story forward without calling attention to their own form. In Book 9, "my fame will never die" is clean and fast. He occasionally loses the weight of specific Greek words by choosing idiomatic English. Merrill is attempting to reproduce Homer's metrical structure in English, which is a scholarly undertaking. His hexameters keep something of the oral, performed quality of the original: "lost is my homeward return, but never will perish my glory" echoes Greek word order in a way Verity does not attempt. The cost is that Merrill's lines can feel effortful to read aloud in English, where stress-based meter and quantity-based meter do not map cleanly. Verity reads faster; Merrill asks more of the reader.
SING, goddess, the anger of Achilles, Peleus' son,
the accursed anger which brought the Achaeans countless
agonies and hurled many mighty shades of heroes into Hades,
causing them to become the prey of dogs and
all kinds of birds; and the plan of Zeus was fulfilled.
Sing from the time the two men were first divided in strife—
Atreus' son, lord of men, and glorious Achilles.
Sing now, goddess, the wrath of Achilles the scion of Peleus,
ruinous rage which brought the Achaians uncounted afflictions;
many the powerful souls it sent to the dwelling of Hades,
those of the heroes, and spoil for the dogs it made of their bodies,
plunder for all of the birds, and the purpose of Zeus was accomplished—
sing from the time when first stood hostile, starting the conflict,
Atreus' scion, the lord of the people, and noble Achilles.